Sunday, January 24, 2010

Caption Contest

  • When I saw this cover I knew this book deserved a better title and tag line than it had. Any suggestions?

The Captions:
  • "The Bitch Whisperer: There wasn't a dog he couldn't master, but the only command she responded to was 'come'." [David Tulloch]
  • "The Dog House*He knew his place and she knew how to keep him there." [Boone]

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Male Chauvinist Centrum

I literally just saw an advertisement for Centrum Ultra Men vitamins that says:

"Of all the things made just for men..."

Followed by a picture of a bobble head, boxer shorts and duct tap.

To which I say: screw you Centrum. Duct tape is for everyone.

That is all.


see more There I Fixed It

Apparently it is part of an equally stupid series of ads which also marks of as 'just for men': easy chairs, drills and barbeques.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Speed Opinion

People saying the movie Avatar is racist need to be given a chill pill and some water in a Captain Obvious mug* to wash it down with. Avatar** is racist like Barbarella is sexist. It's not accidental, its not all bad, and its a fun way to spend an hour or three. And yes, I know how to spell Barbarella because I can see my Barbarella poster from here.

*I feel the strange urge to open a Cafe Press store and offer a "Thank you, Captain Obvious" mug. It would probably be a better use of my time than a point by point fisking of the "Avatar is teh ebil" arguments being made online.

**Totally worth paying extra to see in 3D at a 'Gold Class' cinema.
See also:

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Pant Tantrum

I know I have said this before, but what is the point of a blog if not to inflict one's pedantic rants upon a very small proportion of the general public?

As this is my second rant on exactly the same problem I shall bestow upon this rant a name: the pedantic pant rant.

"Pant" is what a pervert does down a telephone. What a woman wears on her legs is her pants. Although, not these ones of course. I wouldn't be caught dead in them.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

Cover Story

Her: "Why is he wearing so many clothes?"

Him: "Why is she wearing so much make-up?"